Personal space; should that be?
Do you understand that? That people just sit on you uninvited. That they come without pardon in your personal space? Or am I nagging if I find that irritating? I just have to accept that?
It is after all sweet and interested. Hmmm.. I don’t know what to think about it though. What I am talking about?
Personal space; do we have to?
“Personal space is our portable territory. We use personal space to regulate distance between others and as a non-verbal communication tool.”
That distance, that’s the thing. If I know people well I’m fine with them getting close. Vague acquaintances are allowed a little more distance as far as I’m concerned.
I like to have a chat but they don’t have to be on top of my lip. And that’s where it always goes wrong.
During my pregnancy it was apparently permitted to touch my huge belly uninvited. I didn’t mind at all if dear friends or family wanted to touch my belly for a moment. Although it is still a bit odd because you are really touching my bacon and not the baby underneath, but ok. I could understand that. However, it became stranger and especially more irritating when random people started feeling my belly.
Standing in the supermarket and having a chat with a vague acquaintance I could see it happening. First you saw them look. Their gaze wandered down.
Then you got a questioning look. Even before I had a chance to answer that look a hand was held out. Inside no time my belly was caressed. Seriously? Really needed that?
I always smiled faintly but I would have loved to have slapped that hand away. My belly, my baby, my body, gone. Ok, ok, I know it was really meant sweetly and no harm was meant but still..
They just came into my personal space.
Now, months later, the belly is sort of gone. But history repeats itself. In a previous post I mentioned that I am a baby carrier. My little girl regularly sleeps in the sling on my chest. Very close to mom, nice and warm.
Apparently that is also a reason to enter my personal space. Even now I find it fine when friends or family come this close. Cozy, come join us. I could only appreciate it when complete strangers would just keep their distance. When I take a walk in the woods with my son and the little girl on my belly, I am touched on all sides.
Well, that’s an exaggeration but my sling, and its accompanying baby, are often touched anyway. I do understand that it is a cute sight, a little baby snuggling up to mummy, but then you do not need to touch it?
Hmmm.. apparently there is a small point of frustration here. Maybe I should do something about that? Or is it not crazy that I a-relax find people panting in my face to look at my baby? Though of course my baby is worth looking at. Maybe I should just tolerate it then.
This also only lasted a short while. We benefit from the attention anyway. 😉
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